Our wedding will be an interesting mix of Jewish, Sikh, and other traditions that have meaning to us. We give our own meanings to some of the traditions so as to blend them together in a joyful and loving ceremony of progressive bonding and joining.
Taken from both the Jewish and Sikh traditions, the ceremony takes place under a special canopy, the Chupah, as a symbol of the home to be built and shared by the bride and groom. In Judaism, the ceremony is traditionally performed under an open sky, recalling God's promise to Abraham that his descendants would be as numerous as the stars.
Arnon and the minister, Ken Klee, will be waiting under the Chupah before Aman comes. Aman and the bridal party will walk down the aisle until Aman is standing next to Arnon under the chupah. The bridal party will be seated leaving just the three standing.
Ken will speak on love and guide the attendees through a short prayer and meditation on love, joy, and peace. This creates the proper atmosphere for the wedding, making the joining easier.
Many traditions include one or both of the bride and groom walking in circles. In the Sikh tradition, the bride and groom walk together around the holy book. In the Jewish tradition, the bride walks around the groom seven times. The purpose is to create a personal, private, and protected space for the couple to build their new home.
Aman will walk around Arnon seven times as in the Jewish Tradition. This is the first part of the ceremony creating the binding between the two.
In many traditions, the element of fire is used during the wedding either as a center for the ceremony or as a symbol of the union. Aman and Arnon will be lighting one large candle from two small candles to symbolize the union of twin flames. As the two flames become one, the single flame of their union encompases both while both retain their individuality within the union.
When the bride and groom drink together from the same cup (whether that cup contains wine or another drink), they are affirming their promise to nurture eachother. They are also internalizing the union of their marriage, taking it to a deeper level. Aman and Arnon will be combining and then drinking flower essences that have been chosen specifically for this ceremony.
Now, when the bonding is nearly complete, Aman and Arnon will affirm their love for eachother and share their vows for their union. Neither will have heard or seen the vows stated by the other before.
As the final symbol of union and the solidification of the marriage, the bride and groom exchange rings (in the Jewish Tradition) or hars, necklaces of flowers (in the Sikh tradition). In both cases, the circle of the ring and har represent their continuing devotion and fidelity to eachother. Also, each day as they wear their wedding rings, they publicly acknowledge their marriage and carry a physical reminder of their mutual love. Aman and Arnon will exchange both rings and hars.
Privately and quietely, Ken will give Arnon and Aman blessings for their marriage. This helps to bring more joy, love, and compassion into the bond that has just been built, as well as strengthening the bond and pulling it closer. During this time, the attendees will be asked to focus on the happy times in their lives and the people that they love, thereby building a joyful atmosphere.
In the Jewish tradition, a glass is broken by the groom at the end of the wedding ceremony. Arnon will be breaking a glass with the symbolism and intention of breaking and permanently disintegrating all bariers between him and Aman.
At this joyful moment, the crowd can throw up a cheer and start blowing the bubbles they will be provided with. Ken will present the new couple and the two will walk back down the aisle as husband and wife.
As in many traditions, Aman and Arnon will sit on a platform to receive blessings from the attendees. It is traditional to go up and congratulate the new couple two by two, a time when pictures are taken with the couple. Some give some money or gold to bless the couple with financial and material prosperity.